Dont speak
by XxRosexX
Summary: Yet another rocketshippy tale by me. When an accident occurs resulting in a terrible injury, how can Jessie piece her life back together and live with the hanging guilt that she's lied to the world and herself? read it! .
1. Chapter 2

**A new fic by moi! Yah…I am still working on Meowth's monster match making, but I decided I wanted to write something else too. So this is it. Tell me what you think; the next chapter is coming soon. Luvs ya and leaves ya,**

**-Rose**

_You and me… _

_Used to be together._

_Every day together._

_Always…_

A soft downy blanket of snow traced each stationary object along the country lane; the trees branches weighed down by the thick layers, and the frosty snowflakes pattering apon the nearly silent road. Here, our favourite trio traipsed through the slush and wind, cheap coats provided by Giovanni wrapped around their shivering frames. The beige cat-like pokémon Meowth rode on Jessie's head, observing the view, teeth chattering, whilst the other two partners clung to each other in an attempt to create that extra bit of warmth. Jessie loved snow. Despite the fact that she was freezing, a beautiful smile bordered her face, glistening eyes of sapphire blue darting over the fields of white.

Smirking, she proceeded to link arms with her partner, and lean against him as they trudged rhythmically, and James, slightly worried, ignored her actions. Slightly irritated, Jessie bumped his side with her hip, the same smirk still staining her pretty features. The lavender haired boy wasn't expecting the sudden movement, and his foot slipped down the side of the pavement. Everything happened in slow motion. The truck roared towards them like an advancing tauros, steam pouring from the funnels and the huge grated engine gurgling. Jessie screamed, and reached for his hands to bring him back to safety, yet her gloved fingers grasped the empty air. She only remembered the flash of petrified emerald, before a loud bang filled the air, and the truck skidded to an ungraceful halt in the nearby hedge. Jessie stood there for a few seconds before whispering a strangled, 'oh my god.' Then she began to run. Slipping over the icy gravel, the snow burning her eyes as she stumbled to the front of the truck, where James lay cold. She couldn't believe it. It hadn't happened, it just hadn't. She'd reached for James's' hands and she'd pulled him back to safety, and they would laugh about it later like always. The truck driver bumbled about like an idiot, calling the ambulances, but he wasn't even there in Jessie's blue eyes. In a fraction of a second, her life had splintered apart, shattered and cracked like a mirror, shards and fragments flying in every direction, impossible to piece back together. She leant down and crawled towards him, his expression peaceful, eyes closed like he was in a light slumber and would wake up any second.

"James?"

She questioned through a choked splutter of tears that cascaded down her face, filling her lungs and making her cough and tremble violently. Shuddering, she put a gloved hand to his tanned facial complexion. He was gone. In a second. He was dead, and dead before she'd told him how she felt. Meowth scrambled down beside her, his face a mixture of crest fallen shock. "Oh god Jimmy." He mumbled. Jessie didn't hear him. She didn't hear the sound of sirens filling the air, and she didn't see the flashing of blue lights. All she saw was her partner, lying there in front of her, but gone.

"Excuse me miss, are you a friend of this man?"

A voice slipped through her thoughts and she glanced up to be met with the concerned eyes of a policeman. Suddenly, she was overcome with rage for no apparent reason. She stood up and began trembling, her fists clenched.

"He's dead."

She whispered, bringing her pale face close to the dark skin of the cop in front of her, who wore an extremely scared look on his face. Then, her crystal blue eyes became tiny slits of glass as she echoed in a scream of fury,

"HE'S DEAD!"

The policeman fidgeted uncomfortably, but made no move to touch her, whilst Meowth watched in horror. The copper adjusted the collar around his neck and replied, stuttering,

"Well…we don't know that for sure yet miss. We'll keep him in the hospital. There's been some internal bleeding, the nurse thinks, but there's a chance he could pull through."

He hesitated before adding in a whisper,

"A slim chance though."

Jessie watched. She then turned and marched over to her partner in crime, who was being loaded into the back of an ambulance on a stretcher. She pushed past anyone who tried to stop her until she reached the unconscious body. One more, silent tear trickled like a tiny flowing river down her rouged cheeks as she tucked the stubborn thread of lavender hair behind his ear. Then she leant down to his level and whispered so that no one could hear…

"I'm sorry."

_And I really feel… _

_That I'm losing, my best friend._

_I can't believe this could be._

_The end._

**Tell me what ya think! I think I could have made it a bit more detailed…shrugs but overall I think its okay. Reviews would be greatly appreciated! .**


	2. Coping With Trauma

**Yes. I am alive. Sorry its been so long, muse kind of failed me.Thank you so much for your opinions BansheeGirl and Tear! . It's so great that people appreciate my fic. I really like the track Don't Speak too…and I hope that it fitted well with the actual writing. Mweh...anyway. Onto the next chappie!**

**-Rose**

_Our memories…  
Well, they can be inviting.  
But some are altogether  
Mighty frightening._

Cherry red hair bordered the young maidens milky white complexion, unstyled and frayed messily over the thick pillow on which she propped her head. Jessie sighed and rolled over, bringing her knees up to wrap her arms around them, clasping her slender fingers together. Her face wore an expression…well actually it didn't. It was cold and blank, her teeth clenched, in an attempt to prevent more tears from cascading freely down her rouged cheeks, long finger nails digging into her skin so hard she was almost piercing it. Sapphire eyes blinked open and stared into the midnight blue ones of her furry companion, who simply sat there, twiddling one strand of her thick carnelian threads of hair round his beige paw.

"Oh Meowth. Why did I do it?"

Meowth hesitated. He wasn't sure whether she was referring to when she'd pushed James into the road or…the other thing. He hesitated, before looking down into a pair of glistening pools. Then he understood.

"I don't know, why the hell did you?"

Jessie was quick to respond, despite her obvious discomfort at the situation. She growled at the scratch cat and spat,

"I had my reputation to defend!"

"Oh? Well what's more important? Jimmy or you bloody reputation? You know, nine times out of ten you look more stupid being your hard-nut self than the real you! James is dead and all you've done to improve matters is lied to the police!"

Jessie hesitated, eyes wide at his open characteristics, her mouth a little 'o' shape in horror. Then, she flopped noiselessly back onto the bed and smothered her face with her slender hands. It was almost as though she had shrunk, flipped back through time to the tiny girl she once was, sitting in a damp corner in the dark, crying. Meowth writhed in his seat. He hated her for what she'd done, he hated and loathed and detested her for killing his best friend, but he still loved her. She was his best friend too.

"Jess. Please just tell the truth. It will be a weight off your shoulders at least."

"There's no point. NO point. There's no worth in living anymore."

She rolled over so that her back was to the feline and she curled up once more, resting her chin on her knees. She seemed now to be beyond crying, she willed it so much that it was almost impossible to free the salty waves from their glass prison behind the females sapphire eyes.

Flash back-

"The truth, Miss Parker."

"**That is!"**

"His foot slipped down the curb in the icy weather conditions. Is this your final claim Miss Parker?"

_**-silence-**_

"Miss Parker?"

"Yes."

"Positive?"

"Yes."

"Now we turn to the witness. The pokémon with the ability of speech. Is this young lady's statement correct?"

"_Umm…yeah I guess."_

"Positive?"

"_Mhmm."_

"Thank you. You may now leave."

flash back-

She awoke with a jolt, sweat pouring down her face, the cold dampness of it clammy, and sticking to her rocket uniform. Hair stuck to her face as she tore the sheets away from her slim body, ripping the duvet to give herself room to breath. After successfully fighting off the struggling covers, she swung her slim legs over the side of the bed and sat there, swinging them in an almost absent minded manner, focusing her eyes on a bare patch of carpet. What had she done? In her mind a few words repetitively travelled around her brain, echoing and taunting her, almost like some snide disease, a viral infection slowly wrapping around her, killing her. Those words.

_We'll have you believing._

_Truth, can be deceiving._

_'Do unto others' is our Golden Rule_… 

She whispered, gritting her teeth. Truth definitely was deceiving in her case. She mentally, thrashed at herself, kicked and bit and screamed for all she was worth, but she just didn't have the energy to do this physically, which was rare for Jessie. She wished It had been more like a romance movie, where the guy promises that he'll be there for all eternity, and then he almost dies but then doesn't, and they express their passion. But James had never promised that he'd always be there. And he definitely never expressed his passion, just like her.

Suddenly, she felt a wet trickling substance ice her hand, and was shocked to find that she'd been crying. It was then, that mentally, everything kicked in. Her James, Her partner in crime, was gone. That, was when she screamed. Loud and long. All the rockets in the other rooms in the headquarters waking up and tugging their bed sheets over their heads, whereas Meowth nearly hit the roof from fear.

"What on earth do you think you're doin'?"

He shrieked, almost swiping her across the face before his mind registered into gear and he realized why. Though he was far from sympathizing. He was still furious with her. The sandy tinted cat peeped over the side of the single, hard-looking bed to see the carnelian haired lass slopped on the floor, crumpled into a heap. After a while, he curled up in the now vacant bed and entered a restless slumber, whilst Jessie, sat by the chest of drawers, staring at her gloves, eyes a scarlet bloodshot. There, she remained until the pidgeys finally started twittering in the early hours of morning.

_And as, we die,_

_Both, you and I._

_With my head in my hands,_

_I sit and cry._

**Yes its short. I'll write more in the next chapter, and it will be more interesting, promise!**


	3. Surreal Or Reality?

**Whoop! Quick update! Thanks Tear, for your opinion and such. I'll hopefully be online more now, and will definitely start reading all your fics! . on with the chappie.**

**-Rose**

_It's all ending,_

_Got to stop pretending,_

_Who we are…_

Bleep….Bleep…Bleep

Machines chugged and whirred around the unconscious body that lay, wrapped in thin hospital bedding that looked mysteriously like tissue paper. A mask was clamped to the patients face, covering his nose and mouth, and a life support mechanical device was keeping the unfortunate victim of the crash alive. Just. Blood trickled and pumped in and out of the tube that was inserted into the boys' wrist, and his usually bright vivid emerald pools were hidden behind the closed curtains that were his eyelids. Around him, doctors and nurses bustled around in white coats, scribbling on clipboards and checking the devices that the patient was complicatedly wired up to, whilst others still gossiped amongst themselves, discussing the situation. One, with what would have been long dark green hair if it were not captured in a hairnet whispered to their group,

"_Don't you think we should put the poor darlin' out of his misery?"_

A man with thick-rimmed glasses and a grey moustache regarded her with confusion as he hissed in retort,

**"He's not in any pain currently. I think that if we work as hard as we can, we might just be able to save him."**

"_Slim chance."_

**"Slim, but possible. And think of that young lady…what was her name…Jasmine?"**

"_Jessica."_

**"Ah yes, Jessica. Think of how emotionally over the moon she would be."**

"_Mhmm. Yeah. She hasn't even been to see him since the accident."_

"**Well we aren't allowing visitors yet are we?"**

"_No…but you would have though she would have tried to see him."_

"**Anyway, we'll keep trying for now. Agreed?"**

"_Agreed_."

BANG.

Jessie yelped and darted to one side, arms flailing out to grab her partners gloved hands, yet this time she didn't just feel nothing, she saw nothing as well. Confused, she turned back and noticed Meowth entering the small kitchenette area of their room, a puzzled expression painted on his cat-like features.

"Oh my god what just happened?"

She gabbled, clutching her head in her hands and backing up against the wall, sapphire eyes locked on the feline in fear. Meowth, cocked his head.

"I opened the door with too much force, so it hit the wall. Why?"

Almost relieved, Jessie shook her head and turned round to open the cupboard, hoping the pokémon didn't see her cheeks a violent shade of scarlet.

"Jess. I think you better get some help."

Packet of biscuits in her hand, she spun round and glared at the beige cat, whom shrunk away from her icy gaze.

"Why?"

She demanded, fingers shaking with rage as she ripped the packet open and began piling her plate with the crunchy food, only vaguely aware of Meowth.

"Because anything loud and you go into hysterics."

He pointed out, leaping up on the counter to help himself to some digestives, before swinging himself up onto her shoulder and sitting there, showering crumbs in his partners' hair.

Fuming, Jessie grabbed him by the scruff of his neck and threw him off before shoving the biscuits back into the cupboard and marching away from the pokémon, leaving him crumpled on the laminate flooring, rubbing his head.

The day passed slowly. Jessie didn't come out of her headquarters room, and Meowth didn't dare to. And slowly but surely, night was apon her again. Her eyes strained at the tiny fuzzy television propped up on the top of the closet, as she refused to sleep. Even she didn't understand why she was terrified of it. She stuffed herself with popcorn and drank gallons of water, but steadily she felt herself drifting into an uneasy and restless slumber.

She opened her sea blue eyes and sat up, shifting her back against the bedstead and sweeping masses of honey threads away from her face. The television was off. Which was strange, as she didn't remember turning it off herself. Probably Meowth. Yawning, she felt her eyes travel to the side of the bed where she suddenly felt her body go ridged with fear.

"_Oh no. God no."_

"_What? What's the matter?"_

_Doctors bustled over to the patient and one froze as he noticed the silent pulse rate on the green and black screen. His face, creased up in a mixture of melancholy and despair._

"_He didn't make it. He's dead."_

She screamed. Well, tried to. She opened her mouth, but no sound came out. Glistening pools wide and facial mask a mixture-petrified fear, she stumbled away from the figure, which was James. The same stubborn lock of hair caressed his tanned face and he watched her with emerald eyes. A hand extended from his side to touch her, but she writhed away and managed to fly against a wall, heart hammering as she continuously told herself she was dreaming. He didn't move, he didn't open his mouth, but words swam around her, making her feel nauseous and extremely uncomfortable.

**Tell the truth.**

"_Hang on. There's a flicker of life."_

"_There is?"_

"_Yeah…"_

_The nurse with the darkgreen hair started fiddling the different buttons and switches on the machine, and the heart rate quickened, before adjusting to its average breathing rate._

"_Yes! Alive!"_

"_Wonderful!"_

"_Excellent. Now if we can just keep him in this condition long enough to tend to the slight internal bleeding and fluids…"_

She really did wake up that time. Just a dream, just a dream, a dream…she told herself over and over. But she just couldn't sleep, yet now she was scared of opening her eyes in case she saw the same figure. At one point, she dared to take a look, and there was nothing, apart from the steady movement of the curtains as a light wind taunted them.

She couldn't bare it. She was always with James, and now without him it felt so…wrong. Her pale slender fingers outstretched to clasp the sleeping pokémon and she entwined him in her arms hugging him as though he were the only thing left worth living for. Which, in reality, was true. Meowth spluttered in shock as her hands knocked him from his dream-filled sleep, but soon curled round in her cherry hair, his soft beige fur warm against her milky smooth skin.

"Everything is gonna be okay Jess."

The feline whispered as she exhaled and closed her eyes tight to prevent even more tears spilling silently down her cheeks. She didn't understand how her body could still be processing that much water. She murmured something, before replying in a clearer tone,

"Yeah…"

But she wasn't convincing anyone. Not even herself.

_You and me…_

_I can see us dying._

_Are we?_

**Quick notice. It was a dream Jess had, just to prevent any confusion and, "That's not realistic" Type stuff. So yah.**


End file.
